Flirting
Learn how to chat up the opposite sex in Indonesian
"Your eyes are like the full moon."A beautiful Indonesian girl taught me that, with the advice never to use it seriously. Unfortunately she was in love with an American surfer - or maybe fortunately, as I met my wife-to-be soon after.
With many girls in Indonesia men do have to be aware of the cultural and religious differences. Girls may have to put up with hassle if they want to go out with foreign men, and may be branded as "perampuan nakal" (naughty girls). For women going out with men there are difficulties also - they may have to cope with men who are used to women doing all the work.
While younger women may have limits on their freedom, women past a certain age in Indonesia seem to feel they have complete freedom in what they are allowed to say. I remember an old Balinese woman asking my wife pointed questions about my performance, and saying she would meet me on the beach that night - "If I was man enough." Unfortunately, I wasn't, as she pointed out the next morning. Then there were the women at my wedding asking me who was going to win that night, accompanied by hefty whacks to their shoulder to emphasise their point. (Indonesian humour is not subtle!)
| Flirting | Merayu |
| I like you | Aku suka kamu |
| I love you | Aku cinta kamu |
| May I have a date with you? | Apa saya boleh kencan dengan kamu? |
| Darling
Note: Sayang can also be used as a verb. Aku sayang kamu has no exact translation but is somewhere between I love you and I care for you. |
Sayang |
| Hello beautiful | Halo cantik |
| May I speak with you | Boleh saya bicara sama kamu |
| You may | Boleh |
| You are very beautiful | Kamu sangat cantik |
| You are very sweet | Kamu manis betul |
| Really? | Masa? |
| Do you want a date? | Apa kamu mau kencan? |
| I want a date with you. | Saya mau kencan sama kamu. |
| When? | Kapan? |
| Where? | Di mana? |
| Do you already have a boyfriend/girlfriend? | Apa kamu sudah punya pacar? |
| Sorry, I already have a boyfriend/girlfriend. | Maaf, aku sudah punya pacar. |
| Sorry, I am already married. | Maaf, aku sudah menikah. |
| Go away! | Pergi sana! Pergi sudah! |
| Making love | Bercinta |
| Sex | Seks |
| You can also say Mau main sama aku - this literally means to play, but can have other meanings! Mau main di rumah saya (do you want to play in my house), on the other hand, can be an innocent invitation to visit someone's house. |